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Chameleon
I’m walking through the jungle and happen upon a clearing with this lizard telling jokes. I stopped and listened for a couple minutes and said to the tribesman next to me “Hey, this lizard’s pretty funny.” So the tribesman says “that’s no lizard. That’s a stand up chameleon.”
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Kidney
Why do people love you if you donate a kidney, but if you donate five kidneys, they call the police?