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paranoia

“To everyone out there suffering from paranoia.

Just remember you’re not alone.”

This morning I coughed up a pawn, a knight and a bishop. I must have a chess infection.

What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing…it just let out a little wine.

What’s the quietest game you can play? Bowling because you can hear a pin drop!

My friends think I’m a magician when I make candy bars disappear… But little do they know, I’ve got a few Twix up my sleeve…

pi day is a fake holiday made up by math people to sell more math

A flood is just a river that got too big for its bridges.

I’m looking to obtain as many mushrooms as possible.

Please consider donating to my gofungi page.

Just called to make an appointment with a psychic but she told me that I don’t show up.

Last night I met a young lady when I went out to hear music at a bar. Her name was
Ana Crusis.