How many skunks does it take to make a stink?
Just a phew.
Blog
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Thinner
I went down to the paint store to get thinner.
It didn’t work.
I’m still fat. -
PushUp
I did a pushup today!
Well, actually, I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get up, so… you know. Close enough.
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Snakes
What’s worse than a box full of snakes?
A box that was supposed to be full of snakes. -
Corn
Why is KFC corn so smooth?
They use Kernel Sanders -
Woodpecker
A woodpecker visited the Petrified Forest.
He found it impeccable.
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What does Bob Have Now?
Bob has 39 candy bars. He eats 29 candy bars. What does Bob have now? … Diabetes
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Talk To Yourself
I hate it when I’m talking to myself and suddenly realize I wasn’t paying attention, and then I have to start all over.
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Life Choices
In a span of 17 years, 114 people died in accidents while at the gym.
In the same 17 years, only one man died while eating a donut.
Life is about the choices you make.
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Ability To Speak
The ability to speak several languages is an asset, but the ability to keep your mouth shut in any language is priceless.