Just choked on an apple seed. This is what I get for trying to eat healthy.
Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups don’t pull this nonsense.
Category: Dad Jokes
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Donation
A guy knocked on my door today and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool…
I gave him a glass of water.
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Right
My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction.
So I packed up my stuff and right.
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younger pirates
Some of the younger pirates have difficulty relating to the older ones.
It’s likely due to the gen arrrrr ation gap.
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Noisy
Imagine how noisy centipedes would be if they wore tiny flip flops.
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micro
Scientists are working on a small implanted device that randomly emits the sound of a baby chick.
It’s a microcheep.
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Survival Tip 101:
If you are being chased by a pack of taxidermists, do not play dead.
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Laughter
In Laughter, the letter “L” comes first.
All the other letters come aughter!
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Cat Medicine
Got medication to keep my cat from threatening strangers. It’s an anti-hiss-tamine. It is Purrr-fect
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Sign Language
I’m currently learning sign language
So I can tell jokes
nobody has ever heard.