Tozier.net

Category: Dad Jokes

  • Adjectives

    The adjective for metal is metallic, but not so for iron,

    which is ironic.

  • Right Foot

    If you wear a left shoe on the wrong foot, you are wearing it on the right foot.

  • Tea Shirt

    I got kicked out of the coffee club
    I wore a tea shirt.

  • cheesy

    I try to tell cheesy jokes, but everyone around me is laughtose intolerant.

  • Toothbrush

    Why did the toothbrush cross the road?

    … to get a change of paste.

  • Very Sage Words

    NEVER EVER TRADE SPICE for rocks.

    In other words, do not take thyme for granite.

  • Where?

    I told my wife I saw a wolf on the way to work this morning.

    She asked where, and I said no, the regular kind of wolf.

  • Nunsense

    I saw a nun trip and fall today.

    I did what anyone would do… I ran to a sister.

  • Decaf

    My doctor told me I need to switch to decaf coffee.

    It’s gonna be a tough switch for me, I’ve been going to that doctor for years.

  • Jenny

    Did you know that the song “Jenny, Jenny” is so popular that it has been played 8,675,309 times.