Category: Dad Jokes

I asked the lion what he was doing in my wardrobe.

He said Narnia business.

The doctor said my sugar was too high.

When I got home, I moved it to a lower shelf; it’s much more accessible now.

I asked my son why teenage girls always walk in groups of 3, 5, or 7. He said that is such an odd joke. I replied, No. It is because they literally can’t even.

I apologize for my clothes being wrinkly. I am suffering from an iron deficiency.

Incapable = not capable.
Inflammable = flammable.
Invaluable = very valuable.
Thanks for nothing English.

I just got fired from my new job for asking customers if they preferred smoking or non-smoking…

Apparently, the correct question at the funeral home is: cremation or burial.

I am both dumber and smarter than you think.

Never estimate me.

Whoever came up with“a penny for your thoughts”, “don’t nickel and dime me”, and “another day another dollar”
sure knew how to coin a phrase.